DRUNK STONED COWBOY
(Parody of Glen Campbell and “Rhinestone Cowboy”)

Well, I’ve been drinking at my regular bar, and I just put new rims on my car.
I wonder what would happen if I pushed the pedal down all the way.
The bartender said not to drive, but he sure wasn’t the shizz back in ’75.
Jack Daniels does the driving. Mary Jane sits right beside him.
And, now all the cops’ lights are shining on me…

Like a drunk, stoned cowboy.
Falling off of my horse, tripping over my own lasso.
Like a drunk, stoned cowboy.
I’m rattling my cattle. I’m the clown at the rodeo.
I hope my lawyer answers the phone.