HOLLYWOOD LIBERAL

When I saw the film, “An Inconvenient Truth,” it made me cry.

So, I paid someone somewhere to plant a tree for me and bought three Toyota Prii.

I’m on The Atkins Diet.  I’m Vegan.  I’m bullemic.

I’m a member of PETA but I feed my dog roast lamb because he likes it, and he’s hypoglycemic.

I’ve had work done on my neck, chest, face, lips, breasts, eyelids… I’m on several sedatives.

I hate reality TV because it’s not real.  It’s fake, smoothed out, and over-edited.

I’m a Hollywood Liberal.

I believe a woman has a right to choose if she wants to terminate a birth.

But, I think it’s murder if a woman chooses to wear fur… out of season.

I lived four years of my life in South Central Los Angeles.  Yeah, I have lots of black friends… from USC.

After Hurricane Katrina I made a powerful playlist on my iPod and donated it to charity.

I don’t pronounce the “h” in “human being.”  I use the expression, “that’s how I roll.”

I go to demonstrations and yell, “Honk for peace now, assholes!”

I’m a Hollywood Liberal.

I practice Kaballa.  I worship Madonna.  George W’s a jerk off.  I jerk off to Obama.

Borat’s a genius because I fear rednecks.  I love gay sex, hate Jesus, retards live in the MidWest.

I, I, I, I, I, I, me, me, me, me, me, me, cocaine, cocaine, cocaine, elective surgery.

Whine, whine, whine, whine, whine, whine, complain, complain, Tibet, Darfur, raw food, Jon Stewart’s my newsman, Ann Coulter is Satan.

I’m a Hollywood Liberal.